These are the different methods abusers use to gain power and control over a person they are dating. None of these are acceptable behaviors in a healthy relationship. If you, or someone you know is experiencing TDV, please consider these resources for help and healing.
* Please be aware that this page contains images, words, concepts, etc. that may be sensitive or triggering for some individuals. Please use the resources provided, if necessary.
* Please be aware that this page contains images, words, concepts, etc. that may be sensitive or triggering for some individuals. Please use the resources provided, if necessary.
Physical Abuse
Using physically aggressive behavior to attempt to gain power and control over a dating partner. Some examples of physically abusive behaviors include:
Using physically aggressive behavior to attempt to gain power and control over a dating partner. Some examples of physically abusive behaviors include:
- Hitting or Kicking
- Pushing or shoving
- Pulling (including hair)
- Choking or strangling
- Preventing or inhibiting physical movement, including escape from the situation
Emotional Abuse
An attempt to gain power and control over your partner by causing emotional harm. Some of these behaviors are also present in other forms of abuse such as verbal or digital. Some examples of emotionally abusive behaviors include:
An attempt to gain power and control over your partner by causing emotional harm. Some of these behaviors are also present in other forms of abuse such as verbal or digital. Some examples of emotionally abusive behaviors include:
- Minimizing partner's self-worth
- Exploiting partner's insecurities
- Being critical of partner's thoughts and ideas
- False accusations of flirting and/or cheating
- Gaslighting
- Minimizing partner's concerns or worries
- Using blackmail or threats to personally benefit from the relationship
- Isolating partner from friends or family
Verbal Abuse
Attempting to control your partner using words and phrases that are aggressive, manipulative, harmful. etc. Please note that it is possible to be verbally abusive towards your partner even if they aren't present: consider not only how you talk to your partner, but also how you talk about your partner. Some examples of verbal abuse include:
- Name Calling
- Put-downs and belittling
- Being overly-critical
- Yelling
- Intimidation
- Threats
Digital Abuse
Using technology as a tool to gain power and control over your partner. Digital abuse is a huge issue among teens and one of the most common forms of abuse in teen relationships. See examples and get more detailed information on this issue.
Using technology as a tool to gain power and control over your partner. Digital abuse is a huge issue among teens and one of the most common forms of abuse in teen relationships. See examples and get more detailed information on this issue.
Stalking
A pattern of attention, contact and/or communication that has been expressed as unwanted by your partner. This unwanted behavior causes your partner fear or concern for their own safety, or the safety of a family member, friend, pet, etc. Some examples of stalking include:
- Unwanted phone calls
- Unwanted messages via text, voicemail, email, DM, SM comments or messages, etc.
- Unwanted presence at partners home, school, work, etc.
- Giving partner strange or potentially threatening items or "gifts"
- Tracking, following, or watching your partner without their knowledge or permission
- Entering your partners home, car, bedroom, etc. without their knowledge or permission
Sexual Abuse
Attempting to force or coerce your partner into sexual activity without their freely given consent. Please note that sexual activity can include vaginal intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, sexual touching and/or viewing sexual situations. Sexual abuse can be experienced in person, or through the use of technology and is illegal in most states.
Some examples of sexual abuse include:
Attempting to force or coerce your partner into sexual activity without their freely given consent. Please note that sexual activity can include vaginal intercourse, oral sex, anal sex, sexual touching and/or viewing sexual situations. Sexual abuse can be experienced in person, or through the use of technology and is illegal in most states.
Some examples of sexual abuse include:
- Rape
- Sexual assault
- Sexual harassment
- Posting or sharing sexually explicit material
- Using sexual activity to threaten, coerce, blackmail, etc. your partner.
- Sex trafficking
TDV Statistics
Teens and young adults between the ages of 16 and 24 are the most at risk for intimate partner violence, experiencing violence at a rate that is almost three times greater than the national average.
In the last year, nearly 1 in 11 female and approximately 1 in 14 male high school students have reported experiencing physical dating violence.
About 1 in 8 female and 1 in 26 male high school students report having experienced sexual dating violence in the last year.
TDV has long-term consequences. Teens who have experienced TDV are more likely to experience symptoms of depression and anxiety, engage in unhealthy behaviors, like using tobacco, drugs, and alcohol, and think about suicide.